(Picured: UBC Lead Pastor Kyle Lake, UBC Community Pastor Ben Dudley, Lead Worshipper David Crowder celebrating UBC’s tenth anniversary recently)
University Baptist Church in Waco, Texas lost a pastor and friend today. Kyle Lake, father of three, died this morning baptizing in UBC’s morning service, welcoming people into the Kingdom of Heaven. Seems appropriate to me. My greatest memory of Kyle was him teaching me how to tell others about Jesus. He couldn’t have been more than nineteen and I was just a couple years younger, in the youth group of FIrst Baptist Church in Tyler, Texas where we both grew up. His enthusiasm for talking about Jesus and his knowledge of scripture inspired me. I’d never seen anyone so close to me in years so far ahead spiritually, so brave and wise. We younger kids worshiped Kyle, the good looking soccer player everyone wanted to be, standing before us not to draw attention to himself – though there was plenty to admire – but to focus our desires on Christ. He pointed us in the right direction, a life of building Heaven on earth, and then left town headed in that direction himself, eventually pastoring University Baptist Church in Waco.
He leaves behind an amazing Mother and Father who showered Kyle and his brothers and sister with love and sound teaching and made him the man he became. He leaves behind a wife willing to put up with a pastoring husband and his congregation and the demands it must have made on them both, willing to sacrifice for the purpose Kyle and she were made for. He leaves behind three small children who will no doubt remember their father as a playmate, corrector, protector and teacher and will hopefully be told the stories of his life lived well for the rest of their lives. He leaves behind a congregation of students who, if they listened and watched closely and imitated well, are closer to the image and walk of Christ for having their lives crossing paths with Kyle’s. He leaves behind many friends and fellow ministers in the emergent church movement who should now do their best to love and learn and communicate and serve as well as Kyle did.
We know today that Kyle is seeing God clearly now, face to face, his view unobstructed by the haze of this life. He’s missing none of us. He’s lacking nothing. His days are infinite and his heart whole. His tears gone. His hope realized. His company is a crowd that will only grow with time, a multitude of men and women lead to citizenship in Heaven by his words and laughter, random stories and worshipful listening, prayers and preaching of thirty-three years spent well.
We’ll miss Kyle. He’ll leave a hole in many lives. So we mourn that death exists, robs, surprises and perplexes. We mourn children without a father and a wife who’ll sleep alone, parents who couldn’t have imagined they’d bury a child.
We believe God though. We know that His plan has always included Kyle’s death and that it plays a key role, somehow, in bringing fame to Himself, bringing the image of God into greater focus and putting our lives under examination in light of our mortality. God is up to something. Always. And He is keeping His promise to Kyle tonight, the promise of an eternal home, a lasting peace, a crown to lay at the feet of Jesus, a place to worship and delve deeper into the vast knowledge and love of Jesus. So we celebrate. This is not the end of Kyle’s life, merely a transition to life at it’s fullest, without boundaries and body and cares and fears. Kyle is home.
And I’m reminded, losing a friend I’d lost touch with and never got to know as much I wanted to, not to waste people and minutes and skills. I’m seeing life more clearly tonight, in light of mortality, reawakened to eternal perspective. The things I fear seem smaller, the people I aim to please seem less worthy of pleasing, and the time seems short and weighty, purposed from sunup to sundown. The bedtime ritual went by more slowly this evening, in technicolor, slow motion, every sentence prayed by tiny lips reveled in, every stroke of small hands across my beard filled with contentment and comfort. I hugged and kissed my wife harder, longer, noticing how she smells and talks and feels. Staring her in the eyes, telling her more often than usual what she means to me and how much better life is with her for me, not with cliches but with new words that on any other day she’d laugh off as cheesy or strange but today they mean more to both of us. Hundreds of names have filled my head, people I need to talk to, calls I need to make, needs I need to meet and prayers that will be prayed. The first prayer is that the newness of life that this taste of death has brought many of us will last longer than the funeral flowers, that we’ll live fearlessly and focussed – that we will live like Kyle seemed to years ago teaching me about Jesus and teaching me how to introduce others to Him.
MattyMatt says:
hello shaun,
though our only connection is that we’re both members of the blogosphere, i’m so sorry to hear about your loss. i’m also really touched by the grace and affection with which you remember kyle. though i’m not involved with any particular faith, your post has served to remind me of the importance and beauty of faith to so many great folks such as yourself, and kyle, and your friends and family. thank you for making it possible for so many strangers to share in his memory. from your description, i think he would very glad to know how many people he is continuing to touch.
matt.
Laurel says:
Shaun, I just stumbled across your blog, and as a UBCer, I want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart for your words and prayers. We are shocked and in pain, but the amount of support we have recieved is such a blessing. Besides Kyle’s contagious smile and authenticity, I will miss his wisdom most. One thing that jumps out in my memory from a sermon last year was Kyle talking about Romans 8:28. He said that disaster, illness, trajedy, dissapointment, and even death are all natural consequences of the fall of man, and our decisions- not God’s hand. I dont believe Kyle’s death was caused/allowed by God- but I do believe that God will use it for good. We deal with suffering with the help of the Spirit, and God can create good out of disaster. I’m not going to pretend I understand why this happened. It doesn’t even seem real to me. But I am already seeing the good that God is creating. Thank you for sharing your memories and for your prayers.
Tony says:
Shaun, Anne told me to read what you wrote about Kyle. Your words stirred many nearly forgotten memories of good times in Tyler. I too looked up to Kyle, and remember him as the counselor on many of our summer camps, even though he was a year or two older than most of us. That’s the part that struck home to me, realizing that he was so close to our age yet so much more mature in his walk with Chris.
EL MOL says:
great post
thanks
Anonymous says:
Not clearly seeing the screen through tears but attempting to write/type anyway..ie beware of the misspelled words.
Missing you yesterday but so grateful and soul soothing to see so many of us that could make it, come to honor our friend Kyle.
What an amazing testimony to see the thousands of people coming to pay their respects to someone who touched so vast a crowd. From the Heads of Depts and police officers filing by to the smallest amoung us and those who never dreamed of ever or even thought of owning a suit broken-hearted saying their last good-byes.
In an errily phophetic way the words in closing were the words Kyle never had a chance to preach on Sunday morning. He urged each present to feel the wind on your face, live life to the fullest, be grateful for the most mundane of days, notice the beauty suurounding you that was gift created all for your purpose, to tell your parents you love them and hug your kids tighter. That was my friend Kyle. Living all his 33 years to the very fullest.
I grieve for the faces of his family, his dad and mom, David and Shirley for the extra parents they were to all of us, His brothers, Jody and Jona, and his sister Kristi, and for his beautiful wife Jen and three precious babies as they must somehow go one with huge holes in their hearts and a loss we cannot understand.
I take comfort in the fact that he is with the one he truly loved the most and that he will live in my heart until I can see him again. I have loved Kyle since 4th grade as did everyone who spent time with him.
May the fruit that come from our loss be to His Glory. ~~ Blessings, Allison Taylor
Jennifer says:
My heart goes out to the Lake family. We too (in greenville, NC where David crowder played last night) have lost a “warrior for Christ” just 3 weeks ago. Our fellow youth leader at my church, Matt,32, died in a car accident, and he too left behind a wife and two young kids. Matt and Kyle had so much in common. From reading about Kyle and knowing Matt, they both had eternal perspective and every chance they got they shared the salvation message with everyone they could. These men and their wives sacrificed everything for the cause of Christ. They impacted thousands of lives because of the love they received from their friend Jesus. For this we mourn the physical loss of our dear friends, but rejoice because death is not the end for Christians. For us, heaven and eternal life with Christ is the aim of our faith. DEATH HAS NO VICTORY! We will keep standing firm in Jesus Christ and sharing our faith and being imitators of Christ. Our goal should be to finish the race strong just like these men did.
I just wanted to say thank you too to the David Crowder Band. Last night was such a blessing. Thank you for your selflessness, and we in greenville, NC and all over the nation are lifting up the Lake family and UBC to Our heavenly Father who loves us more than we will ever grasp!
Dave L says:
We battle against powers and principalities. Some believers have little or no impact, or perhaps even a negative impact for the cause of Christ because of how they live their lives. They have little to fear from Satan who applauds their ineffectiveness and takes advantage of their help.
For those who serve God, Satan is a roaring lion seeking whom he might devour. When he is given opportunity, he acts.
Electricity seeks a gound with the lowest impedence (the least path of resistance). Normally this is supplied by the PA system. However, something as simple as lifting a ground to get rid of hum in the PA can shift this to any device connected electrically to the PA system. If it has a lower impedence it becomes the new ground. Someone standing in a pool of water holding a mic might become the perfect grounding conduit.
Satan took advantage of an opportunity to take out a warrior for God. It was tragic and it was unecessary. It increases sorrow that it could have been avoided so easily with an overhead mic and standard electrical safety precautions. It is also an example of the enmity Satan has for believers. A highly effective minister of the gospel put himself in a position of physical vulnerability during a baptism and the enemy seized the opportunity.
It reminds me of Keith Green who died in a plane crash in 1982. As I recall from the news coverage at the time, his small plane had too many passengers and too much weight for its capacity. Another warrior for Christ died that day. ( http://www.lastdaysministries.org/keith/history.html )
It is wrong to blame God for this or to say it is proof that God does not exist. There is a real war, and there are real casualties. We should not afford our enemy any opportunity.
We need to remember that God made the laws of physics. He doesn’t normally bend the rules for us just because we are his children. (When He does, we call it a miracle.) The enemy knows this and watches for an opportunity. We should be loathe to give it to him.
My heart also grieves this loss and goes out to family and friends who are suffering. The battle is real. Be vigilant.
scott ayres says:
This event has been hard, real hard for me. On one hand I understand where he’s gone and I know he has received he gift that we all long for. But, on the other hand I’m overwhelmed at time with grief and anger. I either want to laugh about the jokes and stories Kyle used to tell over a burger and shuffleboard at Crickets, or cry, no sob, over the loss of perhaps one of the most influential people in my past, or I get so pissed off I cuss at God and want to give up this whole damn thing we call religion. Why would our God allow something like this to happen to a man of God who is doing His work?? Just makes no sense to me…
I think what pains me most is that I never took the opportunity to tell Kyle how much he meant to me and how much he influenced me. It’s funny how we don’t realize those things until something tragic happens.. We get so wrapped up and caught up in ourselves, and our own pursuits that we forget to pause and thank the ones that got us here. So, I want to take a moment and publicly thank Kyle for what he was and is to me.
Thanks for being a free spirit.
Thanks for making me laugh and laugh alot.
Thanks for being the one back when we started the 2nd or 3rd married couples group at UBC to break the ackward silence when topics got tough (and by breaking the silence I mean breaking wind at times!)
Thanks for being there for Lisa and I after our first miscarriage, with a smile on your face and a casserole dish in hand!
Thanks for letting me yell at you and your God.
Thanks for letting me get angry and not telling me I was going to hell for telling God to fuck off.
Thanks for healing me and showing me how to trust in God again.
Thanks for being at the hospital at our 2nd miscarriage and making fun of Lisa’s socks as she went under anesthesia.
Thanks for your prayers.
Thanks for the lunches at Cricket’s and for letting me whip you at pool a few times, although I think you always won at shuffleboard, too much of a girlie sport like soccer for me!!
Thanks for letting me cry on your shoulder, snot and all.
Thanks for buying me breakfast at Barry’s Bagels one morning so we could discuss me getting into youth ministry.
Thanks for telling me it was ok to mess up and just be me, the kids will appreciate honesty instead of political correctness.
Thanks for being my reference as I applied at churches and putting your reputation on the line for me (although at the time your reputation wasn’t that good! It was 1999 afterall!).
Thanks for crying with us as we left UBC, our home, to pursue what God had in store for us.
Thanks for wearing those goofy zip up padded vests. I thought only my trucker dad wore those, somehow you made them look cool.
Thanks for being just a phone call or email away when I wanted to catch up every couple of months.
Thanks for preaching from your heart.
Thanks for not taking yourself seriously at all.
Thanks for showing all of us that pastors aren’t hypocrits.
Thanks for being honest.
Thanks for being an author.
Thanks for being a movie watcher.
Thanks for wiping a booger on me once during a prayer!
Thanks for being a husband and for showing young college students how to love your wife.
Thanks for being a dad, I wish I could have seen you with your kids, I know you were great…
Thanks for being my pastor.
Thanks for being my friend.
Thanks for being you…..
I’ll miss ya man, enjoy Heaven, and save a place for me at the pool table.. I get winner…
Grace and Peace,
Scott Ayres
Minister through Sports and Recreation
The PARC @ SLFUMC
http://www.theparc.org
[ Lisa and I started going to UBC, less than a year after it started, in early ‘96. The church grew so fast in that first year, that during the Baylor school year it had to meet at the Hippodrome (an old civic theatre seating close to 1000). Now when Baylor was out, we went back to reality and met at this tiny, old church house with maybe 25-40 of us there. Kyle came on staff shortly after this (maybe a year or so) and fit right in with us. It was an exciting time when we bought the building on Dutton and started renovating it and making it our own. Lisa and I went to church there for 4-5 years and left the church maybe 6 months after Kyle took over for Chris (Chris moved back to Houston to start Ecclesia). It was hard for us all, but Kyle filled his shoes well and didn’t miss a beat in pastoring the community there. Lisa and I had a hard time leaving in late ‘99 as God called us into youth ministry at this small country church out in the sticks, but it was what God wanted for us. And I remember Kyle being so supportive of it and helping me through it. We got to know Kyle and Jenn well the previous year or so in our married bible study group. Kyle and Jenn were a part of our 3rd year of meeting and were freshly newlyweds, man they would make me sick!!! I can’t think of any other couple besides Lisa and myself that were more in love..]
sngwriter05 says:
Never been to Texas, so I’ve never met Kyle….but my heart and prayers go out to everyone affected by this loss…..
jodylake says:
Jeffrey Kyle Lake was special. He was different and for those who were fortunate enough to be close to him, they knew this. I love Kyle. I miss my brother and one of my best friends. I was blessed to have been close to him for 33 years. It pains me to live life without a friend that brought me so much joy in living life.
For years we teased Kyle that he was adopted. He was so different with his sandy blonde hair and calming blue eyes. He was a sparkling and radiant person. Kyle was never adopted by my parents. We are full blooded brothers. No, Kyle was not adopted, but was on loan to us for 33 years. I thank God for that time together with him, but I wish I had more.
We played soccer together. My senior year in high school, Kyle made the varsity team as a sophomore. During one practice, coach selected me as one of 6 captains for a 5 on 5 drill. My first selection was Kyle. Many of the other guys on the team made fun of us for my selection of Kyle. I next chose Joel “Bubba” Smith. We faired very well. The truth was that I knew Kyle was good, very good. We played soccer together since the time I turned 5. I miss playing soccer with Kyle.
Today is a different day. It’s quieter today than it was 18 days ago. I wish Kyle were here to visit with me over a cup of coffee. I would love to send him a funny text message or receive a funny one from him. He was such a good brother, friend, counselor and pastor. I’m going to miss Kyle. Although I believe he is in our presence and I will someday see Kyle again, I miss him. I appreciate your prayers and ask that you continue praying for Jenn, Avery, Jude and Sutton and our entire family in the days, weeks and months ahead. God bless you.
Jody Lake