Lent Day 20 – Remember

Psalm 42:1-4
As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, my God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?
3 My tears have been my food
day and night,
while people say to me all day long,
“Where is your God?”
4 These things I remember
as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go to the house of God
under the protection of the Mighty One
with shouts of joy and praise
among the festive throng.

Becky wrote these verses on a piece of paper and ordered me to read them – again and again. Depression had stolen my faith. When I lost my ability to perceive God – because I know now He was there all along – I lost all hope, all reason, all life. I wanted to sleep and never wake up.

But she insisted, so I read…

David longing to just die and see God.

No appetite, wasting away, drinking only his tears.

But then David remembers…

Way back when…God was as real then as his despair is now: “I used to go to the house of God. He protected me on the journey. I shouted for joy when I got there safely. I worshiped Him!”

Rescued by remembrance.

I remembered…

That before the veil of depression covered me, I believed. I believed God was real, that He loved me, and I loved Him back.

Couldn’t I believe again? Couldn’t I love again?

Couldn’t my future look more like my past than this present?

Remembrance challenges the permanence of our present feelings and circumstances. Remembrance reminds us of other possibilities for our future. It gives us hope.

Rescued by remembrance.

Jesus broken the bread. “This is my body.” He poured the wine. “This is my blood.”

“Keep doing this,” He said, “to remember me.”

Remember in the painful, lonely, confusing, passing moments of life that the present is not all that ever was, is not all that ever will be.


Our Prayer

When my soul thirsts for you, God, help me remember the times You have satisfied.
When my tears are my food, God, help me remember when you filled me up with joy.
Give me perpetual hope.