While we’re away as a family for a few days, another post from the archives. This one is from January 2011, before we adopted Sambhaji (from India, not Ethiopia). He’s been ours for almost two years now and I’ve still not forgotten the list.

Thanks for reading. I’ll be back soon.

We’re working with two agencies on our adoption. We’re adopting from Ethiopia through one, based in Texas. The other is local and handles what’s called the “home study.” Both agencies are taking us through hours of training on all things adoption and parenting related. Last night was our first class.

Kim, our teacher, passed out paper and pens and asked us to make a list. Make yours with me now.

First, write down the name of the most significant person in your life.

1. Becky

Write down your most important role.

2. Husband

Now, write down your greatest support group: Church, family, a friend…

3. Brian and Amy

Write down your heritage

4. American?

Next, write the word “knowledge.” This represents the information that gets you through the everyday tasks of your day.

5. Knowledge

Then, write down your favorite place.

6. Home

Write down “Cultural Information.” This represents everything you know about your culture.

7. Cultural Information

Now, write down “Resources.” This represents all your material possessions, everything you own that has worth.

8. Resources

Next, write down “Values.” This represents your faith, concepts of right and wrong, priorities, likes and dislikes…

9. Values

Last, write down the activity that brings you the most joy.

10. Hanging out talking & laughing with close friends

Now, which four things on this list could you live without? Mark through them now.

1. Becky
2. Husband
3. Brian and Amy
4. American?
5. Knowledge
6. Home
7. Cultural Information
8. Resources
9. Values
10. 10. Hanging out talking & laughing with close friends

Now, I promise everything will be OK. You will be just fine. Give up two more.

1. Becky
2. Husband
3. Brian and Amy
4. American?
5. Knowledge
6. Home
7. Cultural Information
8. Resources
9. Values
10. Hanging out talking & laughing with close friends

Now, I am the almighty social worker. Trust me. And give up two more.

I couldn’t. I couldn’t imagine life with any less than this.

I teared up a little. I was surprised at the deep sadness that gripped me. Beyond empathy. Beyond compassion. I think it was mourning.

I mourned all that the children I don’t yet know will give up to become my children.

Am I worthy of all this sacrifice? Is anyone?