I stood backstage filling up with those feelings that have frozen me too many times before. Mostly fear.
Pam Tebow stood at the microphone filling an arena of women with years of hard-won wisdom. Not just how to be a mom but how to be with God, know God, follow God in the process. Even when filled up with fear.
I remembered when Becky was pregnant with our first. How terrified we both were. I sat with my parents spitting a constant stream of worries. What if…
My mom waited patiently for a comma where she might insert some peace. “You’ll be a great dad because you’re worried about being a great dad.”
Is there anyone wiser than a mother who’s mothered for years – lost her patience, lost her kids in grocery stores, lost her car in the parking lot of the mall, lost her mind a time or two hundred and found that none of this matters nearly as much or as long as the things that really do matter?
Backstage, I waited for my turn and prayed and breathed. And imagined the worst that could happen when I walked out on that platform. The worst wasn’t that likely…or that bad. And well worth risking for the best that could happen.
The best? 3600 women could give nutrition, education, health care and Jesus to a child.
I listened intently to the wisdom coming from the mom on stage. What matters – after all Mrs. Tebow’s years of mothering – turned out to be God, His words, His will carried out stumbling and stammering and struggling but always.
Pam closed her notes, prayed and walked out of the spotlight.
Moments later, I climbed the stairs up to the stage, tripping on the second step. God’s will carried out stumbling…but always.
And I didn’t forget what I was supposed to say. I didn’t fall of the stage. I didn’t puke. As every word left my mouth, a bit of fear left as well. And 292 children were sponsored.