Shaun Groves
Most critics aren’t constructive. They tear down the effort of others but draw no plans for the erection of something better in its place.
“You should have” with no “next time, let’s.”
“I don’t like” with no “I’d love it if.”
“I hate it when” with no “instead, perhaps.”
Don’t like that post? Write a better one.
Don’t like that guy? Be a better one.
Don’t like that way? Invent a better one.
This separates those who criticize for sport and self-aggrandizement from those who do it to make us all better.
The most powerful criticism is creation.
Barbara says:
Thank you. This is very well said. There is no point in complaining about the problem if you aren’t willing to be part of the solution. Love it.
Kellie says:
I grew up in a critical home so I am very conscious of criticism. The problem comes when I am more aware of those being critical of me and less aware of my criticisms. I appreciate this post because it reminds us that just a few words can make a big difference.
Josh says:
Well said. I sway towards all things critical in my life more often than I’d like to admit, and that needs to change…pronto.
Kyle Steven Bonenberger says:
Amen.
Matt @ The Church of No People says:
That’s probably the toughest job of a pastor – leading, without making anyone feel like their ideas are invalid.
Mela Kamin says:
I agree – my husband often reminds of this fact – if I want to be critical, I need to be ready with a solution or at least a suggestion and willingness to help change it for the better.
I was actually voted “Most Critical” in high school – yes, that was actually one of the choices, along with titles such as: “most likely to succeed,” “most likely to go to jail,” etc. Nice school, huh? I shrugged it off and wore it as a “I’m just a perfectionist” badge of honor, and used it in my career as a writer/editor, but it wasn’t a compliment. I struggle with this one a lot.
Thanks for the reminder – I tell my kids that we are builders, not destroyers … I often forget to practice what I preach.
Amy says:
My husband just called me out on this a few days ago. It was convicting.
Sometimes we delude ourselves into thinking we’re making some kind of a positive difference just by pointing out what we think others are doing wrong.
Sarah Valente (Kingdom Mama) says:
Love it.
misty says:
Thanks for the reminder!
Kat @ Inspired To Action says:
Wow. So, true.
Shellie (baylormum) says:
My mother passed away 4 weeks ago. She was not only a critic, but a mean critic. Took me until my mid-30’s to say “enough”. Then in my mid-40’s, it took addiction to pain pills to bring me back to me. And God.
I have learned how to quiet the anger & resentment that had built over so many years. Through God & recovery. I never got the chance to share my recovery with my mother. We were estranged. Over not coming to visit them. An 8 hour drive. They RV & travel all over! My hubby & I work. 7 months ago I moved to Central WA from TX.
Now, the guilt for not setting things as right as I could. She suffered a stroke. I had about 2 1/2 days to let her know how much I loved her. That had never changed. I didn’t always like her for how she treated me, my husband, or my daughter. Her eyes had a sadness & tears. I know she knows I forgave her. I had to. Whether she could respond or not.
There is a funny side story. We brought mom home with Hospice. My SIL (an RN) sat with her 2 nights & prayed with her (she would have hated that) AND read from the Bible (she really would have hated that!). My SIL told her she HAD to listen now. I love that woman!
Live life each day as if it is the last! Love each other well.
Jason says:
Great post and well said!