Shaun Groves
What if God’s will comes in two brands: Individual and Universal.
The first answers the questions we’re asking: What should I study? Who should I marry? Where should I live? God’s individual will is for my life only. It’s often grainy, hard to get at, often not making sense until in hindsight.
The universal will of God answers the questions God most wants us to ask. Care for your enemies. Don’t steal. Take only your daily bread. God’s universal will applies to all Christians everywhere, regardless of age, denominational bent or nationality. God’s universal will is frighteningly clear much of the time, hard to wriggle around.
God wills that some Christians get married (individual will) but that every Christian respect and protect marriage (universal will).
God wills that some Christians move to Africa (individual will) but that every Christian care for the poor in some way (universal will).
God wills that some Christians become teachers (individual will) but that every Christian pass on what they know about God to others (universal will).
So where does adoption fall?
Individual (only a select few are supposed to do it) or universal (every Christian who isn’t nuts or destitute should do it)?
Zach Nielsen (Vitamin Z) says:
Adoption is not a Biblical command. Orphan care is. Adoption is more narrow. Orphan care is more broad.
I love adoption. Going to preach on it in three weeks at church. We have a black daughter from Alabama. I am VERY passionate about adoption. It’s a great sign of the Gospel, but I can’t say that it is a Biblical command, but orphan care certainly is.
How do we care for orphans?
Angie Wilkinson says:
Hey don’t leave us hanging. . I was waiting to see your take on it!
Randall says:
My personal view is that every Christian should adopt. It is an awesome picture of what God does for us by bringing us into his family. I wish my wife and I could have adopted more kids besides the one God allowed us to adopt in 1999. However, my wife’s health has slowly deteriorated that it would not be beneficial for us to adopt again (btw, she was unable to have children naturally). Also, trying to adopt though the government system is frustrating because that system is geared toward foster care, not adoption–and after our initial experience with foster care, we decided to go with straight adoption. Our experience is that if you don’t foster care, they don’t want you to adopt. Then, of course, there are the astronomical expenses associated with private adoption. Those are the main two reason we adopted only one. :*( I guess that’s a long answer to your short question. Yes, ALL Christians should adopt instead of letting all these kids grow up without parents.
misty says:
I honestly have no idea but can’t wait to read others thoughts on it.
Part of me thinks it is universal and part of me thinks individual.
Danae Lehman says:
I agree with Zach……
Adoption is not a Biblical command. Orphan care is!!!
Kevin D. Hendricks says:
Great question, Shaun. Many have pointed out that the Bible pushes orphan care, and I think that’s worth noting. There are plenty of examples of adoption in the Bible, but I don’t think that’s the only way we can care for orphans. In some cases what truly needs to be done is finding ways to keep kids from becoming orphans in the first place. While not a quick or easy solution, that’s a much better solution than adoption.
I think Christians should be helping orphans in whatever way is necessary, be it helping the poor, adopting, etc. I’d compare it to you marriage analogy. Not everyone is called to get married, but we’re all called to protect/respect marriage.
That said, I’d love to see orphan care and adoption normalized in the church.
Carole Turner says:
As someone who has adopted both domestic and internationally. I think these are the questions all Christian’s should ask themselves concerning adoption; What is keeping me from it? Is God bigger then THAT?
BUT I also think that adoption is not the only answer to the Orphan crisis. We all have the information, it is a crisis and one that Jesus tells us we must do something about. How can we help children stay with extended family? How can we help a single mom in Ethiopia earn a living and keep her child? Provide medical care for HIV+ children so they can stay with their families? Etc. We all have to ask ourselves these hard questions and then act. Sponsorship of children and families, financial support for families that do adopt, adoption funds, Care centers in high Orphan communities, all these areas are helping Orphans.
But all that being said, I do think many more are called to adopt then actually do, people who feel the tug but let fear or selfishness get in the way.
Brittnie says:
Orphan care is the biblical command.
But all Christians can care for orphans by adopting.
We are!
E-Jayjo says:
We have been in the adoption process for about 3 years now and are currently foster parents. I agree that it is universal that we are to care for orphans. When we talk about being foster parents to people, so many say back to us….”Oh, I could just never do that, I’d get too attached.” This kind of annoys my husband and me because its almost like their saying that their heart is so tender and ours must not be to be able to foster parent. Not true. It is very hard. We are very attached. If you are doing it for the right reason and right motivation, you SHOULD be attached. These kids need someone to hold on to and to love them as if they were their own, even if it means you’re the one who may be broken hearted if and when they go home.
Greg says:
As a father of 3 biological children and one adopted one (intended 2 and 2, but well, sometimes God has other things in mind!), I am a huge advocate for adoption and feel that likely more are called to it than actually do it.
That being said, I do feel the biblical “universal will’ of God applies to orphan care as stated by others. Adoption is a unique calling and not something to be entered into lightly–we all know that families are messy and to assume that ANY family is better than no family is an assumption that has proven itself to be a false one over and over and over again.
I do believe that where God calls, He provides, not that the provision always comes easily or without struggle. So, if someone is sensing that prompting, test it, seek wise counsel, and answer the call.
Michael Patterson says:
This topic is very important to me, and very timely. Three days ago my wife and I returned with our daughter, Daniela from Haiti. The process was long and difficult, but the blessing we’ve received is beyond measure.
In some ways, this experience has been similar to our first trip with Compassion International to visit our sponsored children. We thought we were doing something nice that would bless them. Turns out, we were the ones who received the most joy. The same is true with our adoption experience.
I know many Christians that I have great respect for, and learn much from who have not adopted. I don’t think adoption is for everyone, but do believe that caring for widows and orphans is something that Christians do because they love God.
There are many ways to care for orphans, other than adoption. You can donate to organizations that assist adoptive parents, volunteer at an orphanage, or sponsor a child through Compassion (after all, many children who are put up for adoption are not orphans-but their families just can’t afford to provide for their basic needs).
Many people would adopt if there was more attention focused on the need. Since we started the process, we have friends who have decided to adopt as well.
Caring for orphans is Universal. Adoption is individual… in my humble opinion.
Cards Fan says:
This is a very interesting question. The univeral will of God is clear that we are to be fruitful, multiply, and fill the earth. Jesus also made clear that children were of tremendous value to Him. In addition, Deuteronomy 6 makes it very clear that as parents we have responsibility for teaching our children how to obey and walk with God. Clearly, this is universal will.
Now the transition. For universal will to be … well .. universal, it must apply to all believers. For example, be kind one to another applies to everyone (except my heathen 3 year-old apparently!). Caring for those who can’t care for themselves appears to fall under univeral will. The specific method is in many cases individual will.
Adoption, does not appear to fall under the category of universal will. As an anaolgy, this issue appears to be quite comparable to becoming a missionary to a foreign country. We are all commanded to share the gospel (Matt. 28:19-20), which is universal will. We are not all commanded to go to a specific country. Thus, a calling to carry the gospel to China is just that, an individual calling.
I am not intending for this to come across as besmirching adoption. It is no accident that Christians lead the way in adopting children, who desperately need Christ and homes. The issue is one of universality, and I see no Biblical evidence indicating that, yes, all believers are called to adopt.
Amy says:
I recognize that the biblical command is to care for the orphans. Personally, I take it to mean be a parent to them. Because what is it that an orphan lacks? A parent, or parents. Therefore, what does the orphan need? What parents are supposed to give.
Out of curiousity, how many orphans do you think there are in the world?
Heidi Weimer says:
Three points to consider from Scripture:
1) God says to care for the orphan. (James 1:27)
2) Jesus says to do to others what you would have done to you. (If you were an orphan, you’d want to be adopted. Period.) (Matthew 7:12)
3) Scripture says if you have possessions and see someone in need, but do nothing about it, the love of God is not in you. (You have a family, you have a home, orphans have neither.) (1 John 3:17)
That being said, there is no way I could ever tell anyone (who is not nuts or poor) that it would be against God’s will for them to adopt an orphan.
Knowing what I know and seeing what I’ve seen, I haven’t yet heard a Biblical reason for someone NOT to adopt (barring nutsness or poverty).
Shoot away.
Heidi Weimer says:
There are roughly 143 million orphans in the world. 15 million of those have no living parents.
Only about 5% of orphans in the world are adoptable b/c of gov’ts in birth countries, etc.
As Christians we should do two things:
1) Adopt the kids who are already adoptable.
2) Beseech the govt in countries where kids are NOT adoptable so that adoption will be an option. (This also includes helping kids get adopted within their native countries…the ideal “fix”.)
Kirk says:
I lean towards universal, and feel similarly to Randall’s comment. We have 3 bio children and 6 adopted children from Ethiopia, and it wouldn’t surprise me in the least if that number continued to grow.
No, the Bible does not come out and specifically say, “ADOPT NOW.” But I have read an interesting commentary on the literal translation of the word “visit” found in James 1:27. This same word, “visit” is the same word used in Psalm 8 to describe how Jesus “visit” man. And why did Jesus visit man?…Redemption. Caring for orphans in their affliction certainly involves meeting physical and emotional needs. However, I believe it should primarily involve DELIVERING them from their afflicted state – just as Christ did for us.
And for those who have a special circumstance that specifically would disqualify them from adopting, then identify other areas in the adoption world where maybe you could help facilitate someone else’s adoption. I feel that all Christians should certainly consider adoption. It’s not just for the specially “called” families. It’s not just for the infertile. It’s not just for the “rich” families. If God can provide over $70K for two adoptions in two years for our family, then I know He could (and would) do the same for others.
Why not adopt?? As a husband who always wanted a nice, cozy 2-child existence, I was confronted with the hard question of “why not adopt?” None of my reasonings came close to comparing with the glaring, overwhelming need that is out there. What if those were my kids needing families? And the ultimate conclusion I was faced with…my life is not my own. Use it, Lord.
Kelli says:
My husband and I are grappling with this very thing. I feel a strong calling toward adoption – I have since I was a teenager. I would bring home a child who needs a home tomorrow if I could. It’s a deep, deep desire of my heart.
My husband, while open to the idea, however, does not feel the pull toward adoption. Thus our dilemma.
God’s universal will commands me to respect my husband and allow him to be the leader of our family and make the decisions for our home and I do that willingly because my husband is a great leader.
So, would God place a desire in my heart but not in my husbands? How does that work? And what do I do with this desire of my heart while still honoring and respecting my husband’s leadership? I’m still working that out and waiting in expectation for the Lord to show us His Individual plan for our family. How can I fill this desire and passion if my husband never receives peace that adoption is for our family? What do I do with this calling that I feel? I trust the Lord and I trust my husband that the answer will be revealed to us in the right time.
I don’t think adoption is God’s universal will. I think it’s an individual calling. My husband is a godly man who, at this point in our lives does not feel called to adopt but who is asking the Lord to change his heart if need be. This leads me to belive that adoption is God’s individual will for His people. But caring for the widows and orphans is universal.
Great post, Shaun. Thanks for getting us all thinking.
Sarah says:
Kelly,
My mom had that same exact burning desire to adopt. She was talking about adoption as early as I can possibly remember, and my dad was NOT open to it at all. It took 16 years of hardcore praying until God opened him up to it. They picked me and my 3 siblings up from summer camp and on the drive home, Dad announced that God had changed his heart, and he had decided to start the process. We now have not one, but two little Chinese blessings in our family!
So have faith! God didn’t put that burning desire in your heart for no reason 🙂
Laura @ Texas in Africa says:
Heidi’s point is excellent (and I know her family walks the walk): what in the Bible directs any Christian to NOT adopt?
Was adoption in the sense that we understand it a possibility in the time that the Bible was written? I’m inclined to guess not. I doubt ancient Palestine had childrens’ homes and orphanages. At that time, “orphan care” probably meant that families (both related and in the community) were responsible for taking in children whose parents died or for directly supporting those who did. That sounds an awful lot like adoption to me.
Mark Van Steenwyk says:
Great points about the universality of orphan care. The problem is that this is one of those sorts of abstractions that almost never translate into action. In other words: if you say “everyone should adopt” people have a specific choice to make. If you say “everyone should help care for orphans” then folks are likely to think the $5 they donate every few months to help care for some poor kid somewhere is sufficient.
So while I can’t say adoption is a mandate from God, communities and families of faith need to be deeply vested in care for orphans (as well as for widows, and others who fall through the cracks).
Heidi Weimer says:
Kelli- We hear your story all the time. Here’s what I would say:
No, God would not give you a burning desire to do something that is His will and brings glory to Him and not also give that desire to your husband. He will. Keep praying for Him.
Like I said, we hear your story all the time, where one spouse (usually the mother, but not always) wants to adopt and the other spouse (usually the father) is not ready or is opposed.
My husband wanted 2 kids. He wanted a comfortable existence. We now have 9 kids, 6 adopted. (We’re the ones with the heads chopped off in the photo above!)
God changes hearts to accomplish His will. Keep praying for your husband. I will do the same.
God bless you. Sincerely.
owlhaven says:
I am a mother of 10 kids (4 bio, 2 from Korea, 4 from Ethiopia). As you know, I am a huge adoption advocate. I would not go as far as to say that EVERYONE is called to adopt. However I would like to ask the question, “How great is the need?”
Jennifer Gash says:
I came across this site from a friend’s fb post, and I’m so glad I did. Shaun, thanks for bringing attention to this and thus sparking great conversation.
For the most part, everyone is on the same page…which is great, and unusual. Many will argue this question based upon their convictions (or even levels of guilt, but that’s another story). What nobody can deny is the call Believers have to care for the Orphan.
I’d like to offer up a couple of resources to you. The first is CAFO (Christian Alliance for Orphans) found at christianalliancefororphans.org which is a conglomeration of organizations, churches and individuals all working TOGETHER to care for the three components of caring for the Orphan (adoption, foster care and international orphan care).
Secondly, I’d like to let everyone know about CAFO’s movement to establish a national Orphan Sunday, November 8, 2009. There are endless ways to bring attention and action to those in your social circles and church. More info and resources can be found at http://www.orphansunday.org and I cannot encourage you enough to find a way to educate and bring awareness to others on this day.
Our organization, Sweet Sleep (www.sweetsleep.org) provides beds to orphaned and abandoned children. We are serving as a state coordinator for Tennessee and I would be more than happy to help answer questions, brainstorm or provide you with the right place to connect.
Blessings to each of you!
Jennifer
Heidi Weimer says:
The maddest I ever made people on my blog and FB was asking them for a good reason why they shouldn’t adopt.
Still never got one.
Laura @ Texas in Africa says:
Heidi, can you post links to those posts?
Jennifer, Snapshot says:
Should we all homeschool? Should we all send our children to Christian schools? Or stay “in the world” in public schools?
Should we all be Baptists or Presbyterians or Catholics?
I think that we have to be very very careful at the “ALL” commands and make sure that they are specifically mentioned by name as a part of the Christian faith.
Brian Seay says:
No, I don’t believe is a universal command. Adoption is stinkin’ hard and there are inidividuals or couples who are not equipped to deal with the issues of an adopted child. There are Christians with major marital issues, emotional issues, hidden sins (many of which are sexual), etc. that would actually be doing a disservice (or even harm) to a child brought into their home. Just like every person is not called to be a parent, not every family should adopt.
With that being said, I believe the call of adoption is one being stifled and ignored by thousands upon thousands of Christians who CAN and SHOULD adopt. Adoption will not solve the orphan crisis in our world but it is a part of that solution and it CAN do miraculous, and sometimes life-saving, things for a child. If the reason for NOT adopting is purely one rooted in our own comfort or ignorance, we will not be let off the hook on that one.
I did not do much for the orphan crisis in Ethiopia when I adopted my two children but I have to believe I did something for my children. Now my responsibility outside of that adoption is to continue to work on behalf of the children who may never get adopted. How can we make their lives contain the hope and potential that is present in our lives?
Heidi Weimer says:
Of course if a potentially adoptive family has its own problems, they should not adopt. (I also realize that some people have incredible challenges with children they already have…problems that are not in every family…such as a disabled child, an ill child, etc. Obviously those people would be excluded from a present mandate to take in orphans.)
However, hear me out. If Christians had victory over the things with which we should have victory, then so many of the people who “shouldn’t” adopt could. In other words, I believe the mandate still stands for us to care for orphans, adopt them, etc. If our own screwed-up-mess doesn’t allow us to do so, well that doesn’t mean we aren’t called to do so. It means that our own personal lives are standing in the way of a calling to adopt. Yes, that might mean that not everyone in their present state is capable of adopting and should do it, but it doesn’t mean that it’s not a mandate.
And I totally agree with Brian on his point that: “the call of adoption is one being stifled and ignored by thousands upon thousands of Christians who CAN and SHOULD adopt…If the reason for NOT adopting is purely one rooted in our own comfort or ignorance, we will not be let off the hook on that one.” I would also add FEAR to that list, b/c that is one of the biggest reasons I hear for people not adopting. And we know that fear is not of the Lord.
Sarah says:
I am a 21 year old college senior with 3 younger biological siblings, and 2 VERY younger adopted sisters from China.(They’re 6 and 4) Adoption has changed my life.
I cannot think of a better demonstration of the love God has for us, love that we don’t deserve whatsoever, but He gives us regardless. My parents did not know those two babies. They didn’t even know what they looked like. But they loved those little girls as their own children, even before we had been officially matched. It’s hard to explain meeting this tiny person for the first time and, although there is no blood relation, KNOWING in my heart that she is my sister and I will love her forever.
Yes, care of orphans is Biblical, which would make it a universal issue. But too many people write off adoption as an individual thing. Yes it’s a costly process– in both the monetary and emotional sense. However, the blessings are never ending. My parents are still working to pay off the adoptions (they took place 5 and 3 years ago), but the joy my sisters have added to our lives more than make up for that.
Maybe. . . we should look at it as more on the “universal” side of things than the individual. . .
Dawn says:
Totally think that everyone is called to do something- support financially, with prayers, with giving time, preaching about it…..EVERYONE IS CALLED TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THE ORPHANS AND WIDOWS! It is mandated all over scripture.
Tim Goodwin says:
I would just copy and paste Brian’s post here, but it would be too obvious. Rephrasing it would be boring and make me an overt plagiarist. I will go with: I agree! (Just replace his two adopted children from Ethiopia with my one from Guatemala.)
I do not believe that those who do not adopt are falling outside of God’s will, but I do believe that those who do nothing are. However, this is not just an orphan issue. There are many issues God calls us to address, but, for a multitude of ungodly reasons, we make excuses or choose to ignore them. It is about obedience and being a servant. Those two ideas cover every command I can think of. They are tough and go against our very human nature.
Be broken and it is amazing what God will do. If we all were truly broken and obedient (speaking to myself here) orphan-ism (I like making my own words), homelessness, hunger, divorce and many other world social plagues would be eradicated.
Tracy Goodwin says:
God says to care for others. To serve, to do unto others as you would have done unto you.
So in whatever capacity that you can do that you should, if you live to please Him.
Also, just find it funny/interesting that Tim puts divorce in there with homelessness! hmmm…he must have an incredible wife 😉
jon singletary says:
Hi Shaun, and others,
I agree with pretty much all of what you all are saying – and i love that several of you seem to be not just saying it but living it.
The one biblical argument that i would offer against adoption is in the situation when it prevents the best care of orphans, and as a result their families and communities. When you are the loving adoptive parent, i know it’s hard to imagine that adoption can be unjust, but we know this too often has been the case and has resulted in further oppression and abuse of vulnerable children.
Even in the best situations, Ethiopia, for example, we recently travelled with adoptive parents who learned that their children had loving families who could have been supported to offer better care in the child’s own culture. they didn’t regret their decision to adopt because of what it meant to their families, and their children, but they did see that there are so many community organization trying to strengthen families and communities for vulnerable children.
Again, i am not trying to be antagonistic, but i don’t think the question should be whether or not adoption is a universal calling but rather a question of how – how do we better live out our universal calling to care for the orphan, love the vulnerable, and free the oppressed.
comprised of many great agencies, the Faith To Action Initiative is advocating for just these kinds of things. http://www.faithbasedcarefororphans.org
Brian Seay says:
Jon –
I won’t really disagree with you (partly because you’re a fellow Baylor grad and partly because you are much smarter than me). Adoption, when viewed from the child’s perspective, should be a last option – especially international adoption. The reality in Ethiopia is there are 5 million orphans and only 1,500 will be adopted this year. That means we must be working on ways to strengthen familes, improve medical care, and provide opportunities for parents in abject poverty to find work. However, the flip side to that is the orphans at that last resort point still outnumber the families willing to adopt them.
That’s where this conversation goes in two different directions.
What will do, as part of our biblical mandate, to stand up for the orphans down the street and across the world that will not (and in some cases, should not) be adopted?
AND
Who will step up and say, “My family is going to be the one to blow up my comfort zone and be the answer for a child who is left without a family”?
Beth says:
We have not adopted, but have discussed it a time or ten. There are things (medical history mostly) that prevent us from doing so. However, it doesn’t prevent us from helping orphans (and widows, etc.), or those who are trying to adopt!
I don’t know the Weimers, but I’ve heard lots of stories about their family. I DO know Brian (I hope to meet Amy and the kids one day soon!) though. Our family “journeyed” with his through prayer, fundraisers, etc. as they brought DY and S into their family. I love those kids dearly! I feel like a “proud Aunt” or something where they are concerned.
I don’t feel that adoption in the physical, literal sense is a universal command in scripture. I do feel that as Christians we are all mandated to care for the orphan. What does “care for” mean? It may well mean to adopt. I also think it means to pray, to love, to support, to serve, to feed and clothe, etc. I do this; but not enough, in so many ways.
I think our churches could and should do more to help those who’ve been called to adopt as well as provide more information, etc. to increase awareness.
Beth
Heidi Weimer says:
It always makes me nervous when someone has heard “lots of stories” about us! 🙂
Excellent points by all. And I hope everyone here who hasn’t already does truly consider adoption and ask God whether or not He would have you do it. I can’t imagine Him saying no.
I wrote about this a few months ago. It’s kind of raw, but it’s reality as I know it:
http://blessingsfromethiopia.blogspot.com/2009/06/i-wish-i-could-tell-you.html
Heidi Weimer says:
*who hasn’t already DONE so (typo)
Stretch Mark Mama says:
Hmph.
I don’t know much about anything anymore, but having adopted, common sense tells me that adoption isn’t for everyone.
I see adoption as a good choice among many good ‘life choices.’ I take a very liberal standpoint towards individual will these days. If a person sees some good to do–do it. But every choice requires a commitment of some sort–no one person can do all the good that needs to be done in the world. But one person can do some good, and do it with love, excellence, and with humility before God.
MamasBoy says:
I agree with Zach (vitamin z)
BlessedMomof3 says:
Here are a few questions for the “universal adoption” folks here:
1. How many children have you adopted? Why THAT number? Why not 2 more? 3 more? If you want to state that the Bible mandates adoption, let’s get specific. And if you’ve decided you aren’t adopting more children for any of the same reasons non-adoptive parents give for not adopting at all (not enough money, not enough room, not enough attention to give to the children you do have, too overwhelmed with life as it is now, etc…), then wouldn’t you and your spouse be guilty of the same “sin?”
2. How many widows are you currently caring for? How many people have you visited in the hospital recently? How about hungry people…have you been to your local homeless shelter lately? I hope you are managing your time wisely and caring for these other needs as much as you care for your adoptive children.
My point here is not to show insensitivity to the awesome work you all have done in adopting these precious children. God bless you all for what you have done! But, if you are going to make extreme statements about Scripture, be careful that you are consistent. This conversation is only breeding more legalism withing the Church, which is the LAST thing we should be doing. I realize the point here is that more people should adopt. Yes, that’s absolutely true…more people should adopt. But to make extreme, blanket statements about what EVERY Christian should do is just foolish.
“Do not be overrighteous, neither be overwise— why destroy yourself? Do not be overwicked, and do not be a fool—why die before your time? It is good to grasp the one and not let go of the other. THE MAN WHO FEARS GOD WILL AVOID ALL EXTREMES .” –Ecclesiastes 7:16-18 (emphasis added)
Michelle says:
Adoption is not for everyone. God calls each of us according to our gifts and it takes special gifts to adopt children. We have one bio child and 5 adopted children and each time it has been God’s calling. Each child is a challenge in their own way and not every Christian is equipped to handle their challenges, the same as I am not equipped with spiritual gifts to go to Africa, India, China, etc. and become a missionary.
I do think, however, that the church could be more supportive of those of us who have answered the call to adoption. Our family is often misunderstood and often seen as odd for the fact that we have answered the call. Our last adoption became final just last week with a sibling group. My husband and I are not young, and we are starting over with toddlers.
Yes, we are all called to care for widows and orphans, but I don’t believe that all are called or expected to adopt.
Heidi Weimer says:
I think it’s important for us to realize that God equips the called (all of us); He doesn’t call the equipped.
We are forgetting the crucial element here: the supernatural power of Jesus Christ to enable us to do anything we are supposed to do.
Do I think in my own power I can raise 9 kids, 6 of whom are recently adopted? NO. It is only through the miraculous power and equipping of Jesus Christ through my relationship with him.
I still have yet to here a reason why a follower of Jesus would choose not to adopt (except for what I already stated above). That’s not judging those who don’t; it’s pushing people to ask WHY NOT?
Every reason on this page is still human-focused.
As to the questions above about how many have we adopted and why not more? We have 3 bio, 6 adopted, and we will not stop adopting until God tells us NO, stop NOW, there is no more need.
If every follower of Jesus pitched in and adopted one (or more), then others wouldn’t haven’t to keep adopting anyway.
I would challenge everyone to go to a 3rd world country and visit orphans. And then I would challenge you to look at those orphans as your own biological kids. And then leave them there in their orphanhood.
I would also suggest reading this article:
http://www.togetherforadoption.org/?p=162 (click on the article on the site to read the pdf version).
Dan Cruver makes excellent observations and provides a theological basis and mandate for adoption.
Dan Cruver says:
Love your question, Shaun! I wish more Christians asked it. Short answer: orphan care is God’s universal call for God’s people. Adoption is God’s individual call for particular members of his family.
Here’s the long answer: What we do know is that God has called his people to care for orphans (James 1:27). That much is clear. We who were once on the outside, without God and without hope in this world, were brought near by the blood of Jesus (Ephesians 2:12-13). God brought us into his multi-ethnic household through Jesus (Eph. 1:5).
In Ephesians 2:19 there is an amazing word-play on “aliens” (ESV) and “household.” We who were at one time “outsiders” (Greek word for “aliens” is “par-oikos”) were brought into God’s “household”=”oikos”. God made outsiders (i.e., those without home and hope) insiders (i.e., members of his household). We who once were spiritual orphans without a home (paroikos) have been made children with a home (oikos). So obviously, adoption is central to God’s work of forming his multi-ethnic family.
If we also consider the fact that Christianity has a vertical to horizontal movement (e.g. we love because God first loved us, 1 Jn. 2:19; we forgive because God in Christ as forgiven us, Eph. 4:32; we welcome because Christ first welcomed us, Rom. 15:7), I think we’ll agree there must be some kind of vertical to horizontal movement that mirrors what God has done in Ephesians 2:19.
But that is not to say that every Christian must adopt. Scripture does NOT command us to do that. But we certainly do have the responsibility to care for orphans, particularly those who are without father and mother, in grateful response to what God has done for us. The more we understand texts like Ephesians 2:19 in light of Christianity’s vertical to horizontal movement, the more we’ll care for the orphan in obedience to God’s universal call, as you say. We’ll also see more Christians prayerfully considering whether adoption is his individual call for them.
misty says:
I have often thought of adoption and thought that maybe I would like to adopt. My hubby on the other hand has 2 daughters from a previous marriage and has no desire for more. Until God changes his heart it is not an option.
My biggest thought is…the cost. I honestly think that more people would adopt of it wasn’t so expensive.
Brian says:
Misty, adopting through local public means (like Child Protective Services) is actually incredibly cheap. Oftentimes, you can apply for funding and refunding and actually go through the entire adoption for FREE.
Now, private adoptions, especially international, are a different, and more expensive story.
Brian says:
The assumption for Christians is orphan care, and adoption is one very obvious practical application of that.
However, I think we do adoption a disservice by simply treating it like an option “out there” that we may or may not consider. Many couples thinking about children ask themselves, “Should we adopt?” This is good, but I don’t think it’s the best way to go about it.
Instead, I believe that they might better get at the heart of God’s love for orphans by asking, “Why SHOULDN’T we adopt?” If you can’t come up with any biblical answer to that, then you should probably pursue adoption.
If more people thought of it in this way, we’d have far fewer excuses for not adopting, and far more children in permanent, Christian homes.
Heidi Weimer says:
Agree. Totally. You might not ever wake up one day and hear God say to you: “You are to adopt.”
But, if you ask God, “Should we?”, I can’t see Him saying “No, don’t do it.”
Lindsey says:
Wow. Yet another thought-provoking post.
Shuan–I like that sometimes, you blog turns me upside down, shakes me up a bit, and often leaves me hanging there for awhile while I sort everything out. I think this is one of those posts.
I’m not yet at the point in my life where I could consider adoption (senior in college, getting married next summer, doing graduate school…), but this has made me seriously consider doing it in the future. The fiancee and I will have to have a chat about that, definitely.
It’s something that’s been a passing thought. Something like, “Oh, you know, one day it might be nice to adopt, after my own kids are grown and I have all this free time and energy…” I’m realizing now that it’s totally the wrong approach. Is God CALLING me to welcome another child into my future family as my own? I guess we’ll have to wait and see.
Thanks, Shaun.
Michelle says:
One population of children that is often overlooked is the abused and neglected children in foster care right here in our own back yard. There are thousands and thousands of children right here in our country. With those adoptions come a future of therapy, explanations of why birth parents treated them that way, therapy again, birth parents who don’t go away, tons of patience and mountains of prayer. It saddens me that we see so little in churches that provide even emotional support to those who are called to adopt these children, or a call for Christians to adopt or foster. The need is so huge. These children may not technically be orphans, but they have no parents to care for them or the state has removed their parents.
If we had the financial resources, I’m sure we could be open to more adoptions than our 5, but there is little to no ongoing support to help these children in our situation with the future therapies that they need.
As I mentioned in a previous post, we are often looked upon as odd for going into the ministry calling of God that we have, because it is outside the norm of the middle or upper middle class or we are somehow taking away from our biological child. Those feelings are expressed by our Christian family and friends.
But as I type and hold one of my babies, I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. The passion God has placed in my heart is for the abused and neglected child right around the corner or in a neighboring state.
Tonggu Momma says:
As an adoptive mom of one, who is waiting to adopt a second child from China, I strive to read all that I can about adoption and then consider those opinions and facts using my faith and the Word as my guide.
What I have learned is that Westerners, especially us Americans, don’t look deeply enough into the ethics of both private domestic and international adoption. I have learned that adoption programs often, because of human corruption, slowly become a supply and demand market for couples who long for a child and for families who believe they are doing a good thing. I have learned that adoption is often the “easy” fix for poverty, lack of universal health care and other societal problems that seem too large to overcome.
Most people adopting wish to adopt healthy children, as young as possible. But the children MOST in need of homes are the children with moderate to severe special needs… the children who are over age four… the children who have experienced trauma we cannot imagine.
I don’t know much, but having been an adoptive parent for 4.5 years now, I personally believe that adoption is not for everyone. Adoption does not end when the child joins your family – adoption is a lifelong journey. The two questions everyone should ask themselves are – “am I willing to adopt a child?”… and… “am I willing to become an adoptive parent?” If you answer yes to the first question, but no to the second… then you have more work to do to find out what that difference is and to see if you are called (and willing) to take on the challenge.
Adoption is not a Biblical mandate. The care of widows and orphans IS one.
Peach says:
I agree with your readers that commented that God commands Christians to care for orphans. I once heard a sermon by Dick Bernal in San Francisco that opened my eyes. He shared that the original greek text of the N.T. (where it states we are ‘adopted’ as God’s children) could more accurately be translated as “reunited” as God’s children. I John says we are God’s offspring (uses the greek word ‘sperma’). As an Christian and as an adult adoptee it is a comfort to know that my Father God does not need to adopt me into His family, because I came from Him to begin with. He redeemed me (bought me back) into His Family through Jesus my Savior.