It’s the ultimate display of Jesus-powered evangelical manliness: Two alpha-male boomers enter the ring. A steel cage lowers, fencing the two warriors in for a fight to the death…or the front page of your local newspaper.
One, a complete set of Republican talking points come to life, a comedian with lightening fast lips and a die-hard commitment to never putting down a toilet seat. The other, a bearded long-haired hunter-gatherer and best-selling author, a pied piper leading an army of former Mother Teresa-like girly men in a battle of William Wallace proportions against the castration of the American church.
Two men – the manliest of men – face off for the title of “Most Testosteronic Evangelical in America.”
Every woman wants to submit to them and every man wants to pay them $68 dollars for a weekend of 80s buttrock and instruction on how to grow a pair. Who will take home the prize?
My money’s on Eldridge. He’s wiry and spry. Brody‘s got a Franklin on Stine though. The kneeless jeans give him extra mobility Brody figures. Who’s your pick?
you’ve really got me
I totally have to get myself a wrestling psuedonom.
Any chance you might land a spot on Stine’s ‘worship’ team?
I’m goin with Stine. Sure Eldridge wrote Captivating with his wife but I gotta go with a man who can make me laugh more than one who would make me cry.
I;m gonna go with Rob Bell running in with the chair.
No wait. He’d never do that.
Um. I think I am going with the comic. His entrance music is so awfully bad I am afraid it would stun Eldridge with its badness and allow Stine to come off the top ropes with his patented “Testosterone Thunderkick.”
How bad is this? I tried to go to Brad’s web site from my work computer and was stopped by a warning screen from my agency saying that they’d blocked his website because it was known as a site that had “malicious content.” Whoa. That was my second offense that day. Earlier I’d also tried to go to jockey.com and that was blocked because it was a site that had “lingerie and swimwear.” Yeesh. I just wanted to order some socks.
You work for THE MAN, Nancy, What’d you expect?
Wait. WIll that get SHLOG on the “malicious content” list?
You keep that up and it will!
Then I’ll have to go bat my eyes at the techies to get your site unblocked…